Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

I've moved. Somehow, being in my dorm increases my apathy about studying. Actually, that's not quite the truth. Being here increases my anxiety about exams which leads to hopelessness, which leads to apathy. After about 5 hours of intermittent studying, I'm ready to throw in the towel. What a pathetic evening of studying. I should probably continue, being that I have only made it through three of the five chapters that I am being tested on tomorrow, and considering how lazy I feel, and how little work I actually do during the week. Yes, I should stay up and study some more, but there's this groaning, whining voice inside my head moaning "but I don't wanna..." in that voice five-year-olds use when you tell them to take a bath or eat their vegetables or go to bed.
I also tend to overstudy so for the past five hours I've only reviewed things that aren't going to be on the test. I do that pretty frequently. I take too many notes and I study too many things, trying to commit it all to memory the day before the exam. I have terrible study habits, really. I mean, clearly, because I am not finished and here I am, blogging about studying. As if saying that I should be studying will somehow magically make me be studying right now.
I'm studying Voygotsky. Its interesting how so many early psychologists were German. Freud, Fromm, Voygotsky. The latter Talked about the zone of proximal development, which is where a person can accomplish more with a more skilled partner. He also talks about (and I find this very interesting) a child's private speech. As in, when a little kid talks to his or herself, giving the self instructions or regulating their own behavior. I have this image in my mind of a five year old saying "No, no, no; you cannot wet the bed." This private speech will ultimate become a person's inner speech, or in Freudian terms, the superego (conscience).
So if you were having trouble sleeping, I doubt that you are now. In fact, reader, I can hear you snoring from here. Shall I continue? Yes?
Well I'm also learning about weird Freudian theories: Psychosexual development. It seems that he's talking about how a person's primitive sexual psyche develops from the time he or she is born; starting with oral development and then continuing to grow and develop until death. I'll spare you the details because they make me a little uncomfortable, but it does seem strange to me.
Chapter 2 was largely about birth and biological developments. We talked about abortion in class, and had to debate it. It's something that I've never supported but as a social worker I've begun to try and see "the other" perspective. Its challenging; especially since it emits a fog over my conviction about this. How frustrating. There's talk of Developmental milestones: when a baby can sit up, hold a cup, walk, run, develop speech, etc. Oh goodness, I'll never remember all of this. I wonder if you're understanding my anxiety a bit better now. Chapter 1 was a bit of review from my intro to social work class, talking about the social work process and the strengths perspective.
Oh boy, this is just a lot of work. Maybe I'm just muy perezosa. I would really like that omelet now.
On another note, I missed Glee this week, and it was the premier. How devastating. But I finished the first Harry Potter book this week, for the first time. I greatly enjoyed it. Especially when Neville won those last 10 points for Gryffindor, which won them the house cup. And when Harry got the broom and Draco was being all arrogant about it, and then found out that it was given to him per order of Professor McGonagall. That was wonderful. That stuff doesn't happen in real life.
Guys, tomorrow is Friday! First day of fall, last day of the week. Hurrah (Next week will be longer...don't even get me started)! And tomorrow, I get my tattoo! OH GOODNESS! I'm muy nervosa.

Alright, I've procrastinated quite long enough. Its time I return my nose to the grindstone. Good evening.

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